The Eejits

The Twits in Scots

Author: Roald Dahl

Publisher: Black & White Publishing

ISBN: 1845028937

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 87

View: 6687


Mr Eejit wis AN EEJIT HE WIS BOARN AN EEJIT AND NOO AT THE GRAUND AULD AGE O SIXTY, HE WIS A BIGGER EEJIT THAN EVER. In The Twits, Roald Dahl’s story about the world’s most revolting couple, Mr Twit was horrible and hairy and his wife Mrs Twit was just plain ugly. Now they are honkin, maukit, bowfin and clarty and Mrs Eejit’s hackitness is revealed in all its manky glory. Read Matthew Fitt’s much loved translation of this children’s classic to find out what sleekit terrible things the Eejits do to each other.

The Eejit’s Guide To Learning The Irish Tin Whistle

A tutorial for the musical numpty- Including a little introduction to how music works, how the tin whistle works and some whistle tabs

Author: X. Payne

Publisher: Digital Tin Whistle

ISBN: 0993165885

Category: Music

Page: 35

View: 7193


A book for tin whistle novices. This book is for people who want to learn to play the whistle but know little or nothing about music. As well as teaching you the whistle, it will provide you with an easy introduction to some important aspects of music and a technical yet simple to understand explanation of how music and the whistle work.

Zack Starr

The Heart of Hardknock

Author: Steve Nicholson


ISBN: 1847539815


Page: 160

View: 3844


Zack Starr is an action and adventure packed, fast paced, children's novel which is the first book in a multi-part series.
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The Lord of Opium

Author: Nancy Farmer

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1442482567

Category: Young Adult Fiction

Page: 432

View: 1802


As the teenage ruler of his own country, Matt must cope with clones and cartels in this “electric blend of horrors and beauty” (Publishers Weekly), the riveting sequel to the modern classic House of the Scorpion, winner of the National Book Award, a Newbery Honor, and a Printz Honor. Matt has always been nothing but a clone—grown from a strip of old El Patron’s skin. Now, at age fourteen, he finds himself suddenly thrust into the position of ruling over his own country. The Land of Opium is the largest territory of the Dope Confederacy, which ranges on the map like an intestine from the ruins of San Diego to the ruins of Matamoros. But while Opium thrives, the rest of the world has been devastated by ecological disaster—and hidden in Opium is the cure. And that isn’t all that awaits within the depths of Opium. Matt is haunted by the ubiquitous army of eejits, zombielike workers harnessed to the old El Patron’s sinister system of drug growing—people stripped of the very qualities that once made them human. Matt wants to use his newfound power to help, to stop the suffering, but he can’t even find a way to smuggle his childhood love, Maria, across the border and into Opium. Instead, his every move hits a roadblock, some from the enemies that surround him…and some from a voice within himself. For who is Matt really, but the clone of an evil, murderous dictator? Is his true destiny already predetermined by his genes?

The Wee Book of Irish Wit & Malarkey

A Rake of Clever Craic and Wisdom for Jackeens, Culchies and Eejits

Author: Sean McCann,Paul Ryan

Publisher: The O'Brien Press Ltd

ISBN: 1847178316

Category: Humor

Page: 304

View: 8342


The Irish mix wit and wisdom the way they do whiskey and water, and to the same intoxicating effect. Irish wit is an art form that can be sage, silly, insulting, or profound, but it’s always entertaining. The Wee Book of Irish Wit & Malarkey is a pint-sized draft of potent mirth and malarkey from Oscar Wilde, Jonathan Swift, Brendan Behan, and many other wags, including 'yer man' – your everyday son of the sod – on everything from love and marriage to death and dying and everything in between.

The House of the Scorpion

Author: Nancy Farmer

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1471120384

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 400

View: 4097


Matt is six years old when he discovers that he is different from other children and other people. To most, Matt isn't considered a boy at all, but a beast, dirty and disgusting. But to El Patron, lord of a country called Opium, Matt is the guarantee of eternal life. El Patron loves Matt as he loves himself - for Matt is himself. They share the exact same DNA. As Matt struggles to understand his existence and what that existence truly means, he is threatened by a host of sinister and manipulating characters, from El Patron's power-hungry family to the brain-deadened eejits and mindless slaves that toil Opium's poppy fields. Surrounded by a dangerous army of bodyguards, escape is the only chance Matt has to survive. But even escape is no guarantee of freedom… because Matt is marked by his difference in ways that he doesn't even suspect.

Rat in the Skull

Author: Ron Hutchinson

Publisher: Heinemann Educational Publishers


Category: Drama

Page: 53

View: 7466